Schedule

9:40 AM -- Woke up to the sounds of a catfight. Classic caterwauling right under my window. This after four and a half hours of sleep.

9:42 AM -- Stumbled outside and broke up the fight with Uncertain Doom, the lanky, curious tabby who lives across the street and is dumb enough to keep accosting Percy, a Quebecoise trapped in a cat's body.

10:00 AM -- Made coffee. Guzzled coffee. Nearly choked when I stepped in semi-fresh hairball. Told myself how much I love living with cats.

10:23 AM -- Third cup of coffee. Bad idea, that. Especially when in traffic. Drove with my middle finger out the window. If I'm not careful, it'll get shot off one of these days.

11:30 AM -- Remembered dream I was having right before the catfight intruded. Something that might have been sexual involving Leonardo diCaprio and fairies. Felt dirty, sought shower, which of course wasn't to be found in an office building. Had an extra long cigarette break instead, and a fourth cup of coffee.

12:45 PM -- Lunch. The waiter looked like young Donald Sutherland and sounded like Al Pacino with a Russian accent. Had more coffee and a discussion about Batman's ethics. The waiter's volunteered input: "Batman is dubious hero. Is why I like him. You see new movie?"

2:12 PM -- Overheard the office manager tell Todd, the new guy, that "two wrongs don't make a right." Was glad I'm a temp and I don't have to hear this woman think outside the box, like she did last week when she told Debra, the accountant, to "start the count at the start and end it at the end." Right. Moving on.

3:18 PM -- Phonecall from married friend about get-together this weekend. Did I get his e-mail? Are we getting together at 4 or 4:30? Is "Bob" coming? Didn't correct his assumption that "Bob" and I are involved.

3:52 - 6: 04 PM -- Napped.

6:15 PM -- "Bob" showed up. It's the only way anyone gets a hold of him.

"You look good," he said as he picked up Grizelda, the other cat.
My reply? "I haven't showered in two days."

Which isn't true. It only felt like I hadn't done so.

6:20 - 7:13 PM -- Caught up with neglected blog reads. Was intrigued by the amount of serious things people talk about and contemplated why I avoid doing so. Decided the conclusion is too simple to warrant further thought.

7:37 PM -- Started writing this. Remembered dream I had while napping: vampires invaded the city and I ended up assasinating their leader, Erik Estrada, who was only named that but looked nothing like the real Erik Estrada.

8:10 PM and beyond -- Who knows? "Bob" will probably want to go see Batman Begins again, which is fine because I don't have anything more pressing going on. Or maybe not. Maybe we'll go have that Indian food we kept talking about.

And that concludes that. Should the miraculous occur, and I end up finding a briefcase full of ten million pounds sterling, I'll write my next post from Tibet, where I will have gone to study martial arts with a secretive order of monk-like ninjas.